The Office of Marriage and Family Life: A Ministry of Accompaniment
An Interview with Augustine Institute Alumna Cathy Loh
Cathy Loh serves as Director of Marriage and Family Life for the Diocese of Palm Beach Florida. A 2015 graduate of the Augustine Institute, she enjoys ministering in the Lord’s Vineyard. Working for the Church is a second career for Cathy whose prior experience was in business with roles in marketing and management consulting. She has been married to Les, a convert and a permanent deacon, for over 36 years. They have two children, a daughter-in-law and one granddaughter. Cathy feels privileged to be able to share her love of Scripture through her written contributions to multiple Lectio Bible Studies and Opening the Word reflections.
Faith & Culture
What is the role of the Office of Marriage and Family Life?
Cathy Loh
Family Life ministry touches on the full breadth of the family life cycle. We work directly with individuals and families and in consultation with the parishes to support their marriage and family life ministries. Our work starts right at the formation of a new family unit as we encounter couples during their engagement period and provide them with marriage preparation support. Many couples who seek marriage in the Catholic Church have a faulty or limited understanding of the Sacrament of Marriage, so we need to help them appreciate the beauty and fullness as well as the obligations inherent in this undertaking. We also assist couples in living out their vocation to fruitfulness in marriage with natural family planning education and support. Raising children in today’s culture can be a challenging task, so we offer various programs to assist parents in building a foundation of faith for their family and raising virtuous children. We minister to families through the joys of life and through the times of suffering and loss whether it be the breakdown of a marriage, or illness, infertility, addiction, or some other adversity including the death of a spouse, parent or child. As Pope Francis so often reminds us, family ministry is about accompanying people on their life journey and encouraging them in their faith. Sometimes it may be as simple as offering the gift of listening and prayer or it may be more involved with referrals for therapeutic help or other follow up. Our role is to help families embrace their identity as both a “domestic church” (Lumen Gentium #11) where members first learn about God’s love and how to seek His will for their life and as members of the family of families, the Universal Church, where they experience God’s Kingdom here on earth. Since we are all made in the image and likeness of God (Genesis 1:26), we are made for communion. The foundational source of that communion is the family, the fundamental unit of society that, as famously stated by Saint John Paul II, determines the future of the nation and of the world and where Sr. Lucia, the famous seer of Fatima, indicated that the final battle would be focused.
Faith & Culture
How did you get involved in this ministry?
Cathy Loh
I believe the Lord drew me into working in his Vineyard and then opened my eyes to the needs of his people. When I transitioned from the business world to working for the Church, I started in faith formation at my parish and then became the Director of Religious Education. In that role, I also had the privilege of starting and leading a women’s bible study group which is still going strong and heading into its 18th year! In ministering to the families in faith formation and to the women, both mothers and grandmothers, in the bible study, I would hear their stories including the challenges and heartaches they experienced in their families. I came to realize that so many of us have forgotten who we are as God’s children, that we don’t know “our story” as Catholics, and that the world has so taken over our lives that we are confused about our purpose and unsure of what ultimately brings us true joy. Through this experience, God enkindled a desire in my heart to help strengthen families by bringing them closer to Him through the Catholic faith. When a friend shared with me that the diocese had a job opening for a Director of Marriage and Family Life and encouraged me to apply, I realized that I was being called to consider the prospect very seriously. I knew it would be a wonderful opportunity to positively impact many families. However, I was only about halfway through my coursework at the AI toward my MA degree in Theology, and I was concerned about balancing my own family life with a new job and continuing my education. After much prayer and discernment, I decided to apply and, as they say, the rest is history. I have been leading the Office of Marriage and Family Life for just over five years now.
Faith & Culture
What are the principal challenges you face?
Cathy Loh
The principle challenge faced by all of us engaged in ministry today is this post-Christian culture in which we find ourselves. It is a culture characterized by individualism, materialism, relativism, atheism and so on, where many people falsely claim their “own truth” instead of universal truth. We know that the truth of the Gospel message truly is the Good News, as much today as it was 2000 years ago. However, the message must find new expression with renewed ardor, a “New Evangelization” as coined by then Pope John Paul II, to break through all the noise and allure of our modern culture. Certainly, we take advantage of technology and social media to get our message out, but I think we must remember that the key is investment in people. We must do as Jesus enjoined us to do, to love one another as he loves us (John 13:34). In some cases, we need to invest the time to build relationships or enter friendships with others and witness the love of Christ to them. Sometimes, we just need to stop long enough to listen and pray with a hurting soul.
Another key challenge to healthy family life is the deep wounds many people have experienced due to our impaired culture that downplays universal truth and offers the allure of false promises. Many of us have experienced pain and suffering either inflicted by others or by our own bad decisions. Many also harbor unforgiveness. This woundedness and unforgiveness impact how we relate to others and the world around us, deeply affecting our family lives. In response to this need, we have developed a healing prayer ministry based on the Unbound model originated by Neal Lozano of Heart of the Father Ministries. Through Unbound healing prayer, people are guided by a prayer team through the grace of the Holy Spirit, to identify the wounds and unforgiveness they harbor and release them, making room for God the Father’s blessing in their lives, so they can live in the freedom that Christ won for them on the Cross. We have been blessed to witness beautiful transformation in peoples’ lives through this prayer ministry. In addition, many who have received Unbound healing prayer have shared that it is beneficial preparation for or follow up to the Sacrament of Reconciliation.
Faith & Culture
How has your degree at the Augustine Institute prepared you for the work you do?
Cathy Loh
The work we do in the Office of Marriage and Family Life is essentially the work of evangelization to help families encounter Jesus Christ and invite Him into their daily lives. Our desire and goal is to encourage and help families to embrace the fullness of the Gospel message and live it out as Catholic Christians. My degree at the Augustine Institute provided me with a solid foundation and knowledge of our Catholic faith as preparation for the work of evangelization. Almost all of my electives were Scripture courses because I had, and still have, a thirst to understand God’s message to us in His Sacred Word. I believe that many of us do not know who we are because we don’t understand God’s plan of salvation history as revealed to us in the Scriptures much less that marriage is intended by God to be an icon or image of His love for us. As St. Peter wrote in his first letter: “Always be ready to give an explanation to anyone who asks you for a reason for your hope” (1 Peter 3:15, NABRE). My education at the AI equipped me to do just that!
Faith & Culture
Is there a Saint who inspires you?
Cathy Loh
As a mother myself, I look to the Blessed Virgin Mary as a role model for encouragement and support. She can certainly understand the joys, hopes, fears and suffering I experience on behalf of my family. As the Queen Mother, I trust in her intercession for me with her Divine Son. Further, her witness as a humble and obedient disciple of Jesus Christ is one I try to emulate. I love that her humility is counterbalanced by an inner strength and determination buttressed by a deep faith and trust in God. Her humble fiat expressed to the Angel Gabriel at the Annunciation followed by a life of joys including the praise to God by the heavenly host at her son’s birth and the ultimate sorrow of witnessing that son’s sacrifice on the Cross display an unwavering trust in God and His plan. Nowhere in Scripture do we find any words of self-accolade or self-pity, reproach or blame. Instead, we read that “her soul magnifies the Lord…for he has looked with favor on the lowliness of his servant” (Luke 1:46-47, RSV) and that “she treasured all these things in her heart” (Luke 2:19, 51). For me, Mary is a beautiful witness of what a disciple should be: humble, obedient, steadfast, prayerful, and above all, trusting in the Lord.
